Growing Up: Part 12 (Sevierville, TN)

“No man can order his life, for it comes flowing over him from behind . . .”  (George MacDonald)

After a year in Macon as house parents we packed up our belongings and placed them in a rental truck. If my grandmother’s father was a saint so is my wife. While I drove the rental truck, my family followed behind in our Kia Soul. During the five-hour drive to Knoxville I thought of how we were driving into the unknown. Not only did I not have a job, we didn’t have a place to live. How could this be happening again? I wondered.

When we arrived, we carried our things into a storage unit as the following thoughts raced through my brain:

Now what? I don’t have a place for my family. I don’t have a job. I can’t believe we’re putting our things into storage. Another move, really? Where will our girls go to school? This is such a sad childhood for them.

This was definitely one of the lowest points in my life.

We had lived in the following places:

• Singapore (six years)
• Knoxville (three years)
• Seoul (three years)
• Macon (one year)

That list doesn’t seem too bad. Many military families move to a different country every two years. But that list is hiding months of unemployment, underemployment, living with family, and searching for a job.

As the days passed, I started looking for a job again, and found relief in prayer, exercise, and stand-up comedians on YouTube.

I expected to have a difficult life, but I didn’t know it would be like this. In fact, when we were dating I told Geetha, “I don’t expect to have an easy life.” “When I heard that,” she says, “I should have taken off running.”

Why did I think this way?

Suffering in the Bible

By that time I had spent thousands of hours studying the Bible. I read it daily as a teenager, studied it for four years in Bible college and was working on a master’s degree in seminary. And from all of my study, it was undeniably clear to me that suffering is normal, especially for those who follow God. Consider the following examples:

• Abraham and Sarah waited for their promised son for twenty-five years and wandered around without a place of their own.
• Joseph was sold into slavery by his brothers then falsely accused and imprisoned.
• Moses served as a shepherd in the wilderness for forty years then led thousands of complaining people.
• Job lost his children, wealth, and health.
• Ruth and Naomi lost their husbands and became destitute.
• David ran for his life and sought refuge in deserts, caves, and forests.
• Elijah fled into the wilderness to hide then prayed for God to take his life.
• Jeremiah was rejected and thrown into a muddy cistern.
• Daniel was sent into exile in Babylon and later placed in a lion’s den.
• Peter was arrested, beaten and imprisoned.
• Paul was arrested, flogged, imprisoned, shipwrecked, and stoned.

And of course, Jesus was mocked, beaten, spit on, flogged, and crucified.

How can anyone read the Bible and conclude that life will always be easy? In case these examples are not clear enough, here’s a direct statement from Paul: “We must go through many hardships to enter the kingdom of God” (Acts 14:22).

Western New York

In the summer we went to Western New York as usual for a few weeks. I helped my uncle with his shipping business, did some painting, and since we weren’t sure where we were going to settle, we got approval to homeschool in New York State. I also went to New York City for an interview with a youth organization, but later learned that I didn’t get the job.

“I don’t feel like there’s any place for us,” I told Geetha.

She agreed.

We had not owned a home, moved many times, lived with family, and never felt settled.

“How can we be in this situation again? We’re such losers,” I said. “I just want our own place. Living with family sucks. Looking for a job and home again is awful.”

We were staying with my aunt and uncle, who were extremely hospitable and never made us feel unwelcome. I just wanted a place of our own.

Around this time, my dad talked to me. He had a list of concerns written on a small piece of paper that he pulled out of his shirt pocket. He wasn’t mean, only concerned:

“Why did you leave Singapore?

Why did you leave Seoul?

Are you exercising enough?

Why can’t Geetha work?”

Although he had every right to ask those questions, I got angry and quiet. I was already feeling low.

At night I started to have trouble catching my breath as I tried to sleep. The situation was overwhelming. Maybe I was having a slight panic attack. Then a Scripture came to mind:

No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it. (1 Cor. 10:13)

I knew that the Greek word for “temptation” could also be translated “trial.” We were in a trial, but there would be a way out.

State Farm

About a week later, I got a call from a State Farm agency in Tennessee, where I had applied a couple months earlier. The owner said he was opening a new office in the Knoxville area and he needed another salesman. I was thrilled at the idea of getting out of our situation and accepted the offer.

We moved to Sevierville, Tennessee, the hometown of Dolly Parton, and settled into a first floor finished apartment that belonged to a couple from Texas. Jim, a retired police officer, and Carole, a retired elementary teacher, had a lovely home overlooking a river. They lived above us so we enjoyed their company and helped to take care of their dog.

I started working in November and soon after earned my insurance license. The three of us in the office were new to selling insurance. The owner, a former pastor, explained that we needed to make the calls every day and the sales would come.

Since I don’t like bothering people, cold calling was really tough at first, but I slowly got used to it and found helpful tips online. I called about one hundred people per day, which resulted in a few sales—a life insurance policy and several auto insurance policies. On my drive home each day I enjoyed a direct view of the majestic Smoky Mountains.

One day when I left work I smelled something burning in the air. As I drove I looked ahead and saw smoke coming from the mountains. There was a massive forest fire in Gatlinburg, Tennessee, which made national news. In the end, fourteen people died and about two hundred were injured. More than two thousand buildings, including many homes, were destroyed.

One of my customers, a retired teacher who had worked at an international school in Egypt, lived in Gatlinburg. She described the horror scene and the difficulty of getting out when the fire began.

I was struck by this thought: people had spent their whole lives working toward their retirement home, attained it, then suddenly had it all destroyed.

After three-and-a-half months of selling insurance, my boss and I concluded that, although I was making my daily calls, I wasn’t selling enough. Perhaps this is where my lack of a Southern accent hurt me most. Everyone I called talked like a Southerner so my first vocal impression was foreign.

I asked my former painting boss if he needed help and got a job.

Writing

I also started focusing on my writing again and this time we attended several homeschool conferences where I displayed and sold my books. I enjoyed talking to fellow vendors in Cincinnati, Greenville, and Chattanooga.

When we lived in Singapore I had given a talk to the staff on the theme of God with us. During our time in Sevierville, I revised this talk and published on Amazon.

While working on my writing I also applied for jobs, including interviewing for a youth pastor position at a nearby church. During my conversations with the pastor he told me how he took a sabbatical after serving for about fifteen years. The burden of being the spiritual leader was so great that he seriously considered not returning to the pastorate. That made me think that something is wrong with the way we structure modern-day ministry.

China

In the spring of 2017 I started corresponding with an organization that operates international schools in China. Six months later, after many phone calls, tons of paperwork, and a couple of days in Atlanta for a psychological exam, I was hired to serve as an elementary principal.

Stress

A few days before we left for China, Geetha and I went to a health food store in the Knoxville, Tennessee area. We thought we would stock up on items that would be hard to find overseas. While there, we met the owner of the store. He took us into his back room that had all kinds of charts and diagrams on the walls and he talked to us for about an hour. During our conversation we talked about the air and water pollution in China and other potential health hazards. Then I asked, “What do you think will be our biggest health concern?”

His answer surprised me.

“Stress.”

He was right. A new job comes with its own unique stressors, but when you add to it a new country, new culture, and new language, stress rises exponentially. But by this time we had already been through the transition process more than once.

Arrival

We arrived in China in October 2017. There are many more stories since then, but this marks the end of my story, for now.

Now it’s time for you to tell your story.

“We may trust God with our past as heartily as with our future.” (George MacDonald)

Postscript

In sharing my story I have left out many important events and people. I decided to focus on international experiences, my intellectual and professional journey, honesty, and humor. Thanks for reading!

Part 11